Am I, might be the better question! I have been working unreasonable hours doing tasks that are not my strength that I am not enjoying. I feel removed from my joy, my life force which is all about creating and movement. I feel removed from you all.
Ah, how does one create and move when one is STUCK?! Not easily - that is for sure.
I put Eden to bed and got up to work my 2nd shift tonight feeling as disgusted with myself and my situation as I did this morning.
If you saw the movie Groundhog Day you know exactly what I am talking about.
Loved this movie and it's a great time of year to see it.
I have also considered another fav, Multiplicity... If only I could clone myself, but I am afraid it would end up like this...
If you are thinking what I am thinking which is "isn't she supposed to be leading this program?" "none of this seems very warrior or sage" then you are right we are in agreement and yet I am left knowing somewhere deep inside I am right where I need to be. There is something profound to be learned, to be accepted in this moment. There are things we cannot change and if we hold on long enough and hard enough at some point we have to let go and in letting go that is when the magic happens. For me personally, I call that giving up. I hate giving up and I am at the point where I need and want to. There just has to be something better on the other side of trying to "control" it all.
Abraham's thought for the day is this:
Make up your mind that nothing is more
important than how I feel now, because now is everything. Now is the whole
enchilada. Now is the power of me. Now, now, now, now, now... You might as well
start somewhere, and it might as well be now. Why not start improving your life
now, now, now? ---Abraham
How beautiful is that? That my friends is the 90 day program. That is it, in one simple quote. NOW is the whole enchilada.
I know we have all gotten away from blogging and posting and emailing. But I want to ask everyone in the program to just reply all to this email to the blog and share one thing, one thought:
What is your NOW? You can say my NOW is...